Stats
Numbers that should probably worry me
Everything below is pulled straight from my Steam account, so there's no hiding the 900-hour strategy problem. Only games that have a portal on this site show up here.
- Total hours
- 2269
- Last two weeks
- 16h
- Portals tracked
- 10
- In rotation
- 2
Last synced from Steam: Sep 21, 2026, 5:40 AM
2269 hours is basically…
- ▸94.5 full days without sleeping, eating or touching grass
- ▸56.7 work weeks — unpaid, but emotionally rewarding
- ▸1135 movies I could have watched instead (no thanks)
- ▸648 marathons I definitely did not run
Hall of hours
Ranked by total playtime. The top three get bragging rights, the bottom gets therapy.
Eating my evenings right now
Playtime from the last two weeks. Fresh damage.
Completely official awards
Handed out by me, to me, based on data I cannot argue with.
Time sink champion
Stellaris — 933h
41.1% of all my portal time went here. I'd apologise, but I'd do it again.
Fresh obsession
Valheim — 13.1h in two weeks
Currently eating my evenings whole. Send snacks, not help.
Speedrun of shame
Subnautica 2 — 4h
Booted it, vibed for a minute, got distracted by a different portal. Classic.
One more turn
1165h of strategy & sim
Every single one of those hours started with "just a quick session before bed".
Cold storage
Stellaris
Still installed. Still loved. Still absolutely not being played right now.
Where my taste actually lives
Hours grouped by genre. Spoiler: I like building things and then abandoning them.
- Simulation1165h · 17.3%
- Strategy1165h · 17.3%
- RPG1007h · 14.9%
- Adventure978h · 14.5%
- Indie974h · 14.5%
- Action839h · 12.5%
- Early Access608h · 9%
Achievement damage report
Steam is currently keeping my achievements to itself. To open the vault: Steam → Profile → Edit Profile → Privacy Settings → set Game details to Public, then run a stats sync.
Mobile side quests
No Steam page, so no hour counter — these ones get played on the couch and tracked by vibes.